🇬🇧 An Excellent Listener in Argentine Tango
🇭🇷 Cijeli tekst na hrvatskom jeziku nalazi se u nastavku, a engleski prijevod čeka vas na dnu stranice.
🇬🇧 The complete Croatian text is below; the English translation awaits you at the bottom of the page
🇭🇷 Odličan slušatelj u argentinskom tangu
Zašto često govorimo kako nismo dobar govornik, već da smo dobar slušatelj? Je li biti dobar slušatelj povezano s uvjerenjem kako nas to čini boljom osobom? Isto pitanje postavlja se i u plesu kao što je argentinski tango, koji predstavlja kulturu i umjetnost naroda obgrljenog izričaja plesa, glazbe i poezije te društvenog fenomena. Ujedno postoji i uvriježeno mišljenje kako slušatelj samo sluša te ga stoga nazivamo follower. Slušatelj osluškuje, sluša, prihvaća, nadograđuje izneseno te pruža podršku kao aktivni sudionik.
Osobno smatram kako je ovo uvriježeno mišljenje, budući da neprestano tražimo i očekujemo
priznanje. Stalno očekivanje dovodi nas do nemira te do anksioznosti. Jesam li dobro čula? Je li
poruka jasna? Jesam li dobro reagirala? Sviđa li se moja reakcija i odabir drugoj osobi? Česta
pitanja koja su nam nametnuta i od strane nas samih i od strane okoline. Važno je naglasiti
kako greške u tangu ne predstavljaju greške već novu mogućnost pri kreiranju i razgovoru ili samom slušanju te govorniku daju priliku jasnijeg izražavanja.
Mislimo kako je priznanje lakše dobiti. Kako je ono dovoljno te da nas ono ograđuje od onoga
što ne znamo i ne možemo ..., te kako nas još uvijek ostavlja u tajnosti. Svako slušanje je
obavijeno velom tajanstvenosti, kako u argentinskom tangu, tako i u drugim aspektima našeg života.
Strah prihvaćanja je povezan s strahom od otkrivanja svih naših lica/reakcija koja mogu puno toga reći o nama te od suočavanja s posljedicama skidanja maski – nova akcija. Lica koja bi mogla pokazati naše slabosti te nas dovesti u ranjivo područje. Sam ples uvriježeno predstavlja fizičku predispoziciju. Ples kao vještina se razvija. Svatko ga može svladati i ono najbitnije, dodati mu vlastite začine te čarolije.
Biti dobar slušatelj može biti povezano s pojmom velikodušnosti - davanja vremena nekome. Što je
najdragocjenije. Je li to ono što nas čini dobrom osobom? Dakle, s jedne strane vidimo kako je dobar
slušatelj povezan s osobinom dobre osobe, ali s druge strane nećemo uložiti puno vremena za usavršavanje ove vještine.
Razvijanje vještine slušanja dovodi do razvoja kognitivnih vještina te stvaranja slobodnog prostora i ugode za sve.
"Mala priznata vrijednost slušanja i ispitivanja odnosi se na spoznaju ljudskih odnosa. Često to nisu
činjenice, već ono što ljudi misle da su činjenice, što je zaista važno. Postoji prednost učenja onoga što je nečiji drugi koncept stvarnosti situacije. "(Bryan Bell)
Stvaranje pretpostavki o tome tko bi što morao i kako bi se trebao ponašati može biti frustrirajuće i zamorno.
Otvaranje i stvaranje slobodnog prostora u argentinskom tangu, najstarijem jeziku tjelesne komunikacije koji svi poznajemo, osobito dok smo djeca, kada ga nesvjesno koristimo i razvijamo, prije nego što dođe do svojevrsne industrijalizacije nas samih i naših odnosa, daje bezbroj mogućnosti.
„U argentinskom tangu slušatelj ne sluša samo. Osluškuje, prihvaća, nadograđuje i pruža podršku kao aktivni sudionik.“
— Jelena Somogyi
🇬🇧 An Excellent Listener in Argentine Tango
Why do we often say that we are not good speakers, but rather good listeners? Is being a good listener connected with the belief that this makes us a better person?
The same question arises in a dance such as Argentine tango, which represents the culture and art of a people encompassed by the expression of dance, music, and poetry, as well as a social phenomenon.
At the same time, there is a widespread belief that the listener only listens, and therefore we call them a follower.
The listener tunes in, listens, accepts, builds upon what has been presented, and provides support as an active participant.
Personally, I believe that this is a widespread belief, since we constantly seek and expect recognition. Constant expectation leads us to restlessness and anxiety.
Did I hear correctly? Is the message clear? Did I react correctly? Does the other person like my reaction and choice?
These are frequent questions imposed upon us both by ourselves and by our surroundings.
It is important to emphasize that mistakes in tango do not represent mistakes, but rather a new possibility in creating and conversing, or in listening itself, and they give the speaker an opportunity for clearer expression.
We think that recognition is easier to obtain. That it is sufficient for us and that it shields us from what we do not know and cannot ..., while still leaving us in secrecy.
Every act of listening is shrouded in a veil of mystery, both in Argentine tango and in other aspects of our lives.
The fear of acceptance is connected with the fear of revealing all our faces/reactions, which can say a lot about us, and with facing the consequences of taking off our masks – a new action.
Faces that could show our weaknesses and bring us into a vulnerable area.
The dance itself commonly represents a physical predisposition. Dance as a skill is developed. Anyone can master it and, most importantly, add their own spices and magic to it.
Being a good listener can be connected with the notion of generosity – giving someone time. Which is the most precious thing. Is that what makes us a good person?
Therefore, on the one hand, we see how being a good listener is connected with the quality of being a good person, but on the other hand, we will not invest much time in improving this skill.
Developing the skill of listening leads to the development of cognitive skills and the creation of free space and comfort for everyone.
“The little recognized value of listening and inquiry relates to the understanding of human relationships. Often these are not facts, but what people think are facts, which is what is truly important. There is an advantage in learning what someone else’s concept of the reality of the situation is.” (Bryan Bell)
Creating assumptions about who should do what and how can be frustrating and tiring.
Opening up and creating free space in Argentine tango — the oldest language of bodily communication, a language we all know, especially as children, when we use it unconsciously and develop it further — before the industrialization of ourselves and our relationships, offers countless possibilities.
“In Argentine tango, the listener does not merely listen. They tune in, listen, accept, build upon, and offer support as an active participant.”
— Jelena Somogyi
🇭🇷 Hvala vam na čitanju i plovidbi kroz osjet tijela, slušanje, uzemljenje i prostor bivanja u trenutku sada.
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🇬🇧 Thank you for reading and navigating through the awareness of the body, listening, grounding, and the space of being in the present moment.
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