🇭🇷 Između programa i bivanja: 8 faza buđenja kroz tango
Inspirirano Donom Oakleyjem
🇭🇷 Cijeli tekst na hrvatskom jeziku nalazi se u nastavku, a engleski prijevod čeka vas na dnu stranice.
🇬🇧 The complete Croatian text is below; the English translation awaits you at the bottom of the page.
🇬🇧 The complete Croatian text is below; the English translation awaits you at the bottom of the page.
Svaka osoba kao učenik plesa i plesač, svako tijelo i svaki čovjek prolazi kroz isti ciklus. Dolazimo tražeći figure, korake i gotova rješenja za izgubljenost bez izgubljenosti, tražeći popunjavanje statusa. No, iza te vanjske konstrukcije, zapravo nesvjesno tražimo povratak svojoj bîti — bivanju u kojem nema vrednovanja, u kojem se bude prirodne sklonosti nas samih, nas samih s drugim osobama, te nas samih s drugim osobama i argentinskim tangom.
Voljeti otvorenih očiju. Ogledalo ogledala. Iščekivanje bez očekivanja. Suživot bivanja.
Otvori vrata.
👣 1. stupanj: Nekonceptualna svjesnost
To je ono jutarnje, ogoljeno stanje o kojem smo pisali. Stanje prije nego što um počne skakati. U tangu, to je trenutak prije nego što glazba krene — sekunda potpune tišine u zagrljaju kontaktnih površina gdje još nema koraka, nema pravila, nema koreografije. Postoji samo čisti osjet težine i prisutnosti dvaju tijela te usklađivanja osjetila. Nema koncepta „dobrog” ili „lošeg” plesača. Samo čisto bivanje.
Prije nego što dijete uopće razvije oštar vid (da bi se gledalo u zrcalu) i prije nego što počne razumijevati jezik i riječi (sluhom), ono cijeli svoj svijet, sigurnost i postojanje mapira isključivo kroz dodir i kontaktne površine. To je toplina majčine kože, pritisak tijela o podlogu, osjet vlastitog daha i otkucaja srca. To je čisto bivanje bez ijednog mentalnog koncepta. U tangu nas ovaj prvi stupanj vraća točno u to stanje: učimo ponovno komunicirati kao to dijete – ogoljeno, kroz čistu fiziku dodira, prije nego što nam um nametne vizualne slike ili pravila.
Ono s čim se prvo susrećemo ponovno — kao da se nikada nismo susreli — su kontaktne i dodirne površine. One naše prve: stopala i površine po kojima se krećemo. Dokle traje, kakva je. Naš pritisak savijanjem stopala. Buđenje i oslobađanje one stisnutosti od obuće, od tvrdog hoda i jurnjave bez uzemljenja našeg centra, pokretača tjelesne prisutnosti.
To su one naše noge koje, kada prolaze blizu jedna druge, čine to s dodirom usmjerenim svjesnosti i sigurnosti kretanja. Kroz taj dodir stvara se GPS našeg vlastitog i primljenog prostora. Uz usklađivanje ideja i mogućnosti kreiranja kroz naše različitosti, nastaje sinkro.
Ruke su blizu tijela, mekane, lagane i duboko konektirane s vlastitim bićem.
⚙️ 2. stupanj: Programiranje
Nakon iskonskog osjeta, ulazimo u matricu učenja. Prirodne sklonosti koje nam olakšavaju bivanje, učenje i suživot odjednom se uspavaju. Budi se trčanje, gledanje, hvatanje i stremljenje. Idi, idi. Slažu se složene ideje bez osnove i logike. Nastaje konstrukcija bez dekonstrukcije — rekonstrukcija bez temelja.
Društvo nas uči ulogama i skriptama kako bismo preživjeli dan, a plesna dvorana nas počinje uokvirivati kroz tehnička pravila, geometriju i elemente. Postajemo zarobljeni idejama s ekrana, složenim formama i željom kako postati „napredan” ili društveno i plesno uočen. No, samo dobro uočena osnova, koja se postupno nadograđuje, otvara vrata kreativnosti — a ne nasumično nabacane forme. Rečenica započinje velikim slovom i završava točkom. Rečenica sadržava svoja pravila koja otvaraju vrata mogućnostima... Tako započinje i plesna priča. Netko predlaže, drugi prihvaća. To je prepoznavanje mogućnosti u danom trenutku, promatranje okoline, reakcije i akcije. Zajedničko građenje koje otvara vrata zajedničkoj snazi i kreativnosti.
U ovoj fazi um preuzima kontrolu. Počinjemo skupljati figure, korake i recepte, učeći kako izgledati kao plesač prema vanjskim standardima. Naš se identitet seli iz kontaktnih površina stopala i tijela ravno u preopterećenu glavu. Počinjemo vjerovati da smo zbroj naučenih elemenata i tuđih mišljenja, što nas stavlja u proces stalnog traženja i gledanja. Staneš na prvu stepenicu, a sve vidiš i sve te zanima osim sada i tu. Više ne slušamo duboki puls tkiva ni GPS partnera; umjesto toga, grozničavo analiziramo jesmo li napravili „ispravan” ili „pogrešan” korak. Prirodni osjet i sinkro nestaju, ustupajući mjesto prvoj konstrukciji i oklopu kontrole.
🤖 3. stupanj: Normalna robotska egzistencija
U ovom stupnju, konstrukcija i oklop kontrole potpuno preuzimaju vlast. Postajemo roboti vlastitih naučenih programa. Na poslu odrađujemo zadatke bez prisutnosti, u odnosima funkcioniramo po automatizmu, a na podiju plešemo čistu mehaniku. Ali pritom ne koristimo onu finu mehaniku. Zamišljamo sljedeći korak, analiziramo prošlu pogrešku, dok naša stvarna sadašnjost stoji potpuno zaleđena. Okrenuti smo formi — programu koji često nije u dodiru s onim što se događa baš u tom trenutku. Naše kretanje postaje kruto, linearno, bez boje i bez onih sinkopa živoga.
Najveća zamka ove faze je što isti nesvjesni obrazac prenosimo na sve druge forme i aktivnosti u životu. Odabiremo iste tipove ljudi, ulazimo u iste konflikte i ponavljamo iste korake, a onda se iskreno čudimo ponovljenom rezultatu i promašenom balansu. Umjesto da se zaustavimo na toj prvoj stepenici i dekonstruiramo oklop, mi samo pobjegnemo, odemo na neko drugo mjesto, u novu plesnu školu ili novi odnos, i tamo iznova pokrenemo isti robotski program. Mislimo da se krećemo naprijed, a zapravo samo mehanički ponavljamo matricu.
U ovoj robotskoj fazi postajemo opsjednuti i vanjskim manifestacijama: razmišljamo o obući, odjeći, opremi, podu i društvu oko nas. Fokusiramo se na to kako povećati broj – koji festivali, maratoni, učitelji i radionice nam trebaju. Kalkuliramo tko mora biti uz nas na podiju i u životu da bismo rasli, tražeći partnere koji su nam isprogramirano i tehnički kompatibilni, potpuno nesvjesni da je to iluzija. Upravo to vanjsko skupljanje, uvjetovanje i traženje matematičke kompatibilnosti postaje teret koji nas udaljava od stvarnog, živog suživota. Umislimo napredak, a zapravo stvaramo zbroj svega onoga što nas koči da budemo iskreno prisutni i slobodni.
⚡ 4. stupanj: Prekretnica
I tada, u tom stalnom krugu trčanja i mehaničkog ponavljanja, događa se zid. Prekretnica. To je trenutak u dvorani i svakodnevici kada sav onaj vanjski dekor — skupe cipele, statusne radionice i proračunata kompatibilnost — odjednom izgube sjaj. Sustav se počinje kvariti. Shvaćamo da smo, unatoč svim skupljenim figurama i festivalima, duboko umorni, ukočeni i, u suštini, prazni.
Oklop kontrole postaje pretežak za nositi. Možda nas tijelo zaustavi kroz bol, možda nas susret s partnerom na podiju ogoli kroz promašen balans, ili nas jednostavno preplavi osjećaj da više ne želimo „izgledati” dobro na slici ne-postajanja ili više ne izgledamo sebi za sebe. Tada opet stanemo na prvu stepenicu, a vidimo onu najgornju i sve uokolo. Proračunavamo, proračunavamo. Mijenjamo ljude oko sebe koji bi funkcionirali kao mi kako bi mogli opet osjetiti svoj smisao. Ili biramo opet one koji nas puste da isto razmišljamo kako bismo konačno osjetili napredak. A one koji su samo bili tu shvaćamo kao pritisak i smetnju.
To je trenutak krize, ali i prve stvarne mogućnosti. Više ne možemo pobjeći u novu formu ili novu školu jer shvaćamo da svuda nosimo isti robotski program. Prisiljeni smo zaustaviti se na toj prvoj stepenici i priznati sebi da nas skripta više ne hrani. Oklop počinje pucati..
❓ 5. stupanj: Postavljanje velikog pitanja
Kada umor od neprestanog proračunavanja napokon nadvlada potrebu za kontrolom, maske padaju. Više nas ne zanima kako povećati broj maratona, niti tko mora stajati uz nas da bismo lažno osjećali napredak. U tom trenutku praznine, kada stari robotski program konačno utihne, plesač i čovjek postavlja ono jedno, stvarno, veliko pitanje.
To pitanje više ne glasi: „Koja je sljedeća figura?” ili „Kako da izgledam napredno?”.
Pitanje zadire duboko ispod oklopa: Tko se zapravo budi u ovom tijelu kada glazba krene? Što ja ovdje doista osjećam, a što samo glumim?
To je trenutak u kojem se fokus s vanjske forme divljom snagom vraća na unutarnje kontaktne površine. Shvaćamo da su vrata i prozori cijelo vrijeme bili tu, širom otvoreni. Plodna zemlja i sjemenke su već u nama. Trebalo je samo prestati trčati, uistinu stati na te sjemenke, otvorenih očiju, te ih koracima prekriti zemljom i zaliti čistom prisutnošću. Veliko pitanje otvara vrata radikalnoj iskrenosti prema samome sebi — shvaćamo da smo cijelo vrijeme tražili suživot bivanja, a ne isprogramiranu kompatibilnost slike bez okvira. Voljeti se otvorenih očiju. Ogledalo ogledala.
🌱 6. stupanj: Otkrivanje onoga što smo oduvijek bili
Nakon što smo stali na sjemenke i zalili ih prisutnošću, događa se tiho čudo. Shvaćamo da ono što smo grozničavo tražili kroz stotine figura, festivala i proračunatih kompatibilnosti, nikada nije bilo izvan nas. Otkrivamo ono što smo oduvijek bili: ono ogoljeno dijete s prve stepenice, biće čiste nekonceptualne svjesnosti koje svijet spoznaje dodirom, a ne zrcalom.
U tangu, to je trenutak kada se pokret napokon oslobađa tereta glume. Stopalo ne udara pod; ono se u njega ulijeva. Noge koje prolaze blizu jedna druge više ne izvršavaju mehanički program, već plešu živu sinkopu trenutka. Ruke blizu tijela nisu više kruti obruč kontrole, već mekani, lagani vodiči strujanja daha. Shvaćamo da je naša unutarnja arhitektura fascija i tkiva savršena točno takva kakva jest. Ne moramo „izgledati” kao plesači; mi jesmo ples. Istina tijela, koja je cijelo vrijeme bila prigušena oklopom, napokon izlazi na površinu slobodna i divlja.
⚓ 7. stupanj: Stabiliziranje našeg otkrića
Nakon što smo otkrili svoju bît ispod oklopa, pred nama je najvažniji rad: stabilizacija tog stanja bivanja. U tangu i svakodnevici, to znači da sloboda pokreta i duboki unutarnji mir više nisu samo slučajni, privremeni bljeskovi nošeni južinom i sjevercem. Učimo kako disati i ostati uzemljeni čak i kada se ritam ubrza, kada okolina postane nemirna ili kada nas stari programi pokušaju povući natrag u proračunavanje i kontrolu. Učimo da je u redu imati osjećaj juga i sjeverca, u redu je odlutati jer smo zapravo TU.
Stabilizacija je trenutak u kojem naš GPS pokretača tjelesne prisutnosti postaje trajna osnova, osovina i mobilnost. Svaki put kada um pokuša skočiti u prošlost ili budućnost, mi ga svjesno i nježno vraćamo natrag na kontaktne površine — u stopalo koje se savija o pod, u osjet noge uz nogu, u mekoću ruku. Više se ne borimo protiv oklopa; mi ga jednostavno više ne navlačimo. Naša os i balans postaju stabilni jer više ne stremimo formama, već dopuštamo suživotu bivanja da se ukorijeni u svakom našem koraku koji stvaramo sami sa sobom, drugim osobama i argentinskim tangom.
♾️ 8. stupanj: Usklađivanje sa životom
Na samom vrhu ovog puta, kada prihvatimo da je u redu i odlutati i osjećati vjetrove jer smo zapravo TU, događa se konačno stapanje. Više ne pokušavamo kontrolirati ples, niti se trudimo „biti prisutni” — mi to jednostavno jesmo. Naši unutarnji zupčanici u potpunosti se usklađuju s ritmom vanjskog svijeta, s glazbom i s drugim bićem. Unutarnja osovina i vanjska mobilnost postaju jedno. To je uvažavanje naših mogućnosti i mogućnosti druge osobe s kojom stvaramo plesnu priču bez formi iz kojih ako izađeš propada sve, a ako se u njima zadržavaš, a potrebna je promjena, gubiš povezanost stvaranja u trenutku sada. Poput kapetana koji plovi morem: bez obzira na to što ide istom rutom, more je svaki put drugačije i zahtijeva neprestanu prisutnost i prilagodbu svakom novom valu.
„Zamišljamo ili živimo? U tangu ne možemo proračunavati korake i 'izgledati' dobro na slici ne-postajanja. Poput kapetana koji plovi morem: bez obzira na to što ide istom rutom, glazba i partner su svaki put drugačiji, zahtijevajući neprestanu prisutnost i prilagodbu svakom novom valu u trenutku sada.”
Every person as a dance student and dancer, every body and every human being goes through the same cycle. We arrive looking for figures, steps, and ready-made solutions for a lostness without lostness, seeking to fill a status. Yet, behind that external construction, we are unconsciously searching for a return to our essence — a state of being where there is no evaluation, where the natural inclinations of ourselves, of ourselves with other people, and of ourselves with other people and Argentine tango, finally awaken.
Loving with open eyes. Mirror of mirrors. Anticipation without expectation. Coexistence of being.
Open the door.
👣 Stage 1: Non-Conceptual Awareness
This is that morning, stripped-down state we wrote about. The state before the mind begins to jump. In tango, it is the moment before the music starts — a second of absolute silence within the embrace of contact surfaces where there are no steps yet, no rules, no choreography. There is only the pure sensation of weight and the presence of two bodies, alongside the alignment of the senses. There is no concept of a "good" or "bad" dancer. Just pure being.
What we first encounter all over again — as if we had never encountered it before — are the contact and touch surfaces. Our very first ones: the feet and the surfaces upon which we move. How long it lasts, what it feels like. Our pressure through the flexing of the foot. The awakening and releasing of that tightness caused by footwear, by a harsh gait, and by rushing without grounding our center — the engine of our physical presence.
These are our legs which, when passing close to one another, do so with a touch directed toward awareness and the safety of movement. Through this touch, a GPS of our own and the received space is created. By aligning ideas and the possibilities of creating through our differences, synchro is born.
The arms are close to the body, soft, light, and deeply connected to our inner being.⚙️ Stage 2: Getting Programmed
After the primordial sensation, we enter the matrix of learning. The natural inclinations that facilitate our being, learning, and coexistence are suddenly put to sleep. Rushing, looking, grasping, and striving awaken. Go, go. Complex ideas are piled up without basis or logic. A construction without deconstruction occurs — a reconstruction without foundations.
Society teaches us roles and scripts to survive the day, and the dance floor begins to frame us through technical rules, geometry, and elements. We become trapped by ideas from the screen, complex forms, and the desire to be "advanced" or socially and digitally noticed. Yet, only a well-perceived foundation, gradually built upon, opens the doors to creativity — not randomly piled-up forms. A sentence begins with a capital letter and ends with a period. A sentence contains its rules which open the doors to possibilities... That is how a dance story begins, too. One proposes, the other accepts. It is the recognition of possibilities in a given moment, observing the surroundings, reactions, and actions. Co-creating that opens the doors to shared strength and creativity.
In this stage, the mind takes control. We begin collecting figures, steps, and recipes, learning how to look like a dancer according to external standards. Our identity shifts from the contact surfaces of the feet and body straight into an overloaded head. We begin to believe that we are the sum of learned elements and other people's opinions, which puts us in a constant process of searching and looking. You stand on the first step, and you see everything and care about everything except the here and now. We no longer listen to the deep pulse of tissue or the partner's GPS; instead, we restlessly analyze whether we made a "right" or "wrong" step. The natural sensation and synchro disappear, giving way to the first construction and the armor of control.
🤖 Stage 3: Normal Robotic Existence
In this stage, the construction and the armor of control take full command. We become robots of our own learned programs. At work, we perform tasks without being present; in relationships, we function on autopilot; and on the dance floor, we dance pure mechanics. Yet, we do not use that fine mechanics. We imagine the next step, analyze the past mistake, while our actual present stands completely still. We are focused on form—a program that is often not in touch with what is happening right in the moment. Our movement becomes rigid, linear, colorless, and stripped of the syncopations of the living.
The greatest trap of this phase is that we transfer this exact unconscious pattern onto all other forms and activities in life. We choose the same types of people, enter the same conflicts, and repeat the same steps, and then we are genuinely surprised by the repeated result and the missed balance. Instead of stopping on that first step and deconstructing the armor, we simply run away, go somewhere else, to a new dance school or a new relationship, and start the exact same robotic program all over again. We think we are moving forward, but we are just mechanically repeating the matrix.
In this robotic phase, we also become obsessed with external manifestations: we think about footwear, clothing, gear, the floor, and the social circle around us. We focus on how to increase the numbers—which festivals, marathons, teachers, and workshops we need. We calculate who must be by our side on the floor and in life for us to grow, searching for partners who are programmed and technically compatible, completely unaware that this is an illusion. This very external collecting, conditioning, and searching for mathematical compatibility becomes a burden that distances us from a real, living coexistence. We imagine progress, but we are just creating a sum of everything that actually holds us back from being genuinely present and free.
⚡ Stage 4: A Turning Point
And then, in that constant cycle of rushing and mechanical repetition, we hit a wall. A turning point. It is the moment on the floor and in everyday life when all that external decor—expensive footwear, status workshops, and calculated compatibility—suddenly loses its shine. The system begins to malfunction. We realize that, despite all the collected figures and marathons, we are deeply tired, rigid, and, at our core, empty.
The armor of control becomes too heavy to carry. Perhaps the body stops us through pain, perhaps an encounter with a partner on the floor strips us bare through a missed balance, or maybe we are simply overwhelmed by the feeling that we no longer want to "look" good in an image of non-becoming, or we no longer look good to ourselves, for ourselves. Then, once again, we stand on the first step, yet we see the very top one and everything around us. We calculate, we calculate. We change the people around us to find those who function just like we do, so we can feel our sense of purpose again. Or we choose, once more, those who allow us to think the same way, just to finally feel progress. And those who were simply there, we perceive as pressure and an obstacle.
This is a moment of crisis, but also of the first real possibility. We can no longer run away into a new form or a new school because we realize we carry the exact same robotic program everywhere. We are forced to stop on that first step and admit to ourselves that the script no longer nourishes us. The armor begins to crack.
❓ Stage 5: Asking the Big Question
When the exhaustion of constant calculation finally overrides the need for control, the masks fall. We are no longer interested in how to increase the number of marathons, or who must stand beside us just to make us feel a false sense of progress. In those moments of emptiness, when the old robotic program finally goes quiet, the dancer and the human being asks that one, real, big question.
That question is no longer: "What is the next figure?" or "How do I look advanced?".
The question cuts deep beneath the armor: Who is actually waking up in this body when the music starts? What am I truly feeling here, and what am I just faking?
This is the moment when the focus shifts with wild force away from external form and back to the internal contact surfaces. We realize that the doors and windows were there all along, wide open. The fertile soil and the seeds are already within us. We just needed to stop running, to truly stand on those seeds with open eyes, cover them with soil through our steps, and water them with pure presence. The big question opens the door to radical honesty with oneself—we realize that all along we were searching for a coexistence of being, not the programmed compatibility of a picture without a frame. To love oneself with open eyes. Mirror of mirrors.
🌱 Stage 6: Discovering What We Have Always Been
After standing on the seeds and watering them with presence, a quiet miracle takes place. We realize that what we restlessly sought through hundreds of figures, festivals, and calculated compatibilities was never outside of us. We discover what we have always been: that stripped-bare child from the very first step, a being of pure non-conceptual awareness that perceives the world through touch, not through a mirror.
In tango, this is the moment when movement is finally liberated from the burden of acting. The foot does not strike the floor; it pours into it. The legs passing close to one another no longer execute a mechanical program, but dance the living syncopations of the moment. The arms close to the body are no longer a rigid hoop of control, but soft, light conductors of the breath’s flow. We realize that our internal architecture of fascia and tissue is perfect exactly as it is. We do not have to "look" like dancers; we are the dance. The truth of the body, which was muffled by the armor all along, finally surfaces, free and wild.
⚓ Stage 7: Stabilizing Our Discovery
After discovering our essence beneath the armor, the most important work lies ahead: the stabilization of this state of being. In tango and in everyday life, this means that the freedom of movement and deep internal peace are no longer just accidental, temporary flashes carried away by the southern and northern winds. We learn how to breathe and stay grounded even when the rhythm accelerates, when the environment becomes restless, or when old programs try to pull us back into calculation and control. We learn that it is okay to have the feeling of the south and north winds, it is okay to wander off because we are actually HERE.
Stabilization is the moment when our GPS of physical presence becomes a permanent foundation, axis, and mobility. Every time the mind tries to jump into the past or the future, we consciously and gently bring it back to the contact surfaces—to the foot flexing against the floor, to the sensation of leg against leg, to the softness of the arms. We no longer fight the armor; we simply no longer put it on. Our axis and balance become stable because we no longer strive for forms, but allow the coexistence of being to take root in our every step that we create with ourselves, other people, and Argentine tango.
♾️ Stage 8: Coming into Alignment with Life
At the very peak of this journey, when we accept that it is okay to both wander off and feel the winds because we are actually HERE, the final dissolution takes place. We no longer try to control the dance, nor do we strive to "be present" — we simply are. Our internal gears align completely with the rhythm of the outside world, with the music, and with another being. The internal axis and external mobility become one. This is the appreciation of our own possibilities and the possibilities of the other person with whom we create a dance story free from forms—forms where if you step out, everything falls apart, and if you hold onto them when a change is needed, you lose the connection of creating in the moment of now. Like a captain sailing the sea: regardless of going the exact same route, the sea is different every single time, requiring constant presence and adaptation to every new wave.
In tango and in life, this stage brings a sense of deep, inexplicable trust. We no longer look for validations, collect statuses, or overcalculate outcomes. When we step onto the floor, our movement becomes a pure extension of the breath. The boundary between proposing and accepting disappears; all that remains is a compassionate synchronization where two differences pour into a shared strength and creativity. This is that new way of possible living that we were subconsciously searching for all along. The door is wide open, and we are finally breathing, dancing, and existing in perfect coexistence with what is.
„Are we imagining or are we living? In tango, we cannot calculate steps and 'look' good in an image of non-becoming. Like a captain sailing the sea: regardless of going the exact same route, the music and the partner are different every single time, requiring constant presence and adaptation to every new wave in the moment of now.”
Jelena Somogyi
Hvala vam na čitanju i plovidbi kroz ovih 8 faza buđenja.
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Thank you for reading and navigating through these 8 stages of awakening.
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